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Relationships

Need proposal ideas? How creative can you get?

Late one evening, I sat with my back toward the dark skies, fresh from a thunderstorm, still clad in my office attire at the office. I was doing heavy research into flash player functionality and surfing YouTube as a reference site.

Randomly, I clicked on this proposal video that looked vaguely interesting and voila… my research faded into nothingness as it took precedence on my screen. Soon, 2 other colleagues crowded around my Mac to watch this heart-warming proposal.

My favourite part is where they strip off their blue t-shirts to reveal the white ones.

It is a tad shaky, but the content is great – believe me. Enjoy!

The Simple Things in Life


Alex’s iPhone pic

After a long day of shoot, I completely enjoy coming home to my husband Alex for a snuggle (after the shower, of course!). But today, I came home from my morning shoot to find french toast and coffee waiting for me in the kitchen. And of course, Alex. :)

After yesterday night’s squabble about “Me being very careless and dropping things often” which made me a little upset… I guess after this surprise breakfast, all is forgotten. For those of you who know about my goldfish memory, forgetting is really easy to do.

Isn’t that what relationships are all about? You love, step on each other’s toes, yell occasionally, and then forgive and forget. And then, you eat french toast.

Thank you notes & Love Languages

It is at times like these when clients drop a thank you note unexpected onto my lap that I feel so appreciated. I completely enjoy my job, and even more so when I get chocolates and hand written notes! Recently, two clients gave me notes that I truly appreciate.

If you have read the book “The Five Love Languages“, you will understand when I say that my love language is ‘words of affirmation’. Essentially, the book explains that every human being has a different way of expressing and interpreting love. Out of the many ways we express love, the top five ways are categorized as:

1. Words of Affirmation – Hearing words like “I love you” or “You mean the world to me” is really important to you. (Yup, I love to hear people saying nice things about me! Makes me feel loved!) And because words are so important, when you hear words that are insulting or hurtful, it really really hurts.

2. Quality Time – One of my other love languages too (you can have more than one I think, but usually one is more primary than the other). This is when your other half gives you ALL of his attention, and by this I mean, not like having a date with you in a nice restaurant but playing games on his iPhone at the same time. (ahem, Alex, please take note!) Basically, quality time together is really important to you. You enjoy doing things together because you simply love spending time together.

3. Receiving Gifts – It’s when you really appreciate the idea of receiving gifts because you feel loved when the person who gave you the gift went to such effort to give you something. It’s not about materialism but it is about the thought behind it.

4. Acts of Service – This is Alex’s language of love. He feels loved whenever I do things like try to keep the house neat, turn off the heater switch when I get out of the bathroom, or run little errands for him when he doesn’t have time for it. And this is what bugs him the most about our relationship – sometimes I can be a really lazy person! Or it hurts when I make a commitment to do something and then forget about it later (which happens very very frequently due to my forgetful nature!)

5. Physical Touch – It’s not just about physical intimacy, it’s about little acts of touching, like hugs, stroking your cheek, or holding hands… they all communicate the idea of care & concern.

Interestingly enough, the way you show love (your love language) may not be the way your partner feels loved. So, since Alex’s love language is acts of service, no matter how much I tell him, “I love you”, it doesn’t mean as much to him as me picking up the clothes off the rack! To him, it’s when I take time off to do things out of my comfort zone for others (or him) that he feels that I am showing love.

Ok, now that I’ve rambled on enough about love languages, back to the thank you notes! Here’s a card and chocolate that Siva & Sumi gave me last week (the box was just taken out of the fridge when I took this shot).

Pre-Wedding: http://stories.my/engagement-portraits-siva-sumitha/
Wedding: http://stories.my/siva-sumitha-temple-wedding/

And this graphic was created by Ash & Candace! While I was in Krabi shooting their honeymoon, they had taken some shots of Alex and I on the go, and created this little jpg! (actually, it’s not so little, it’s like 4000 pixels wide!) It’s so cool!

Since the text is a little small, I’ve typed it out here:

“It’s our turn now to be photographers!!!! How? Can make it or not?? Lucky the subject matters are good looking. Once again, Ash and I would like to thank you for making our photography sessions so engaging, fun and flexible. Don’t know how but you managed to capture all our moments maybe by some teleportic abilities or having some hidden cameras somewhere, but Man, didn’t we look good that day in the pics! Heh. We deeply appreciate the extra goodies you gave us (Johan and the video snippets) which made our day even more special. To top all of that, the honeymoon crashers folks enjoyed your company in Krabi and had only good things to say about Alex and you. Thanks for being a part of our big day and making it so wonderful. Take care and God bless the small people. =)”

Loads of love,
Candace & Ashley

Pre-wedding: http://stories.my/ashley-candace-in-singapore/
Wedding: http://stories.my/ashley-candaces-wedding/
Honeymoon: http://stories.my/krabi-honeymoon-shoot-of-sorts/

Thank you so much! I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again, I feel lurrrved!!

Light Hearted Readings

Every now and then, I receive an email with some really hilarious jokes. Since the dawn of age, men and women have had their differences. Hence the need for books like “Men are from Mars, women are from Venus”. And also courses like these…

Summer Classes for Men at
THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
by Friday, August  28 th 2010
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM

Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays–Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll–Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?–Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor–Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
Dinner Dishes–Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 6
Loss Of Identity–Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things–Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch–Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost–Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday’s noon, 2 hours.

Class 11
Learning to Live–Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy–Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You’re Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7 :00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14
The Stove/Oven– What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.
Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

Musings: Communication & Expectations

One trend that I’ve noticed is how often photographers include their spouses in their business. For example, Jasmine Star has her husband JD 2nd shoot for her, Louis Pang has his wife Jasmine run the office, and Jenny Sun has her husband Ju 2nd shooting at times as well. Some of my photographer friends say they try to get their wives/husbands involved. Some prefer bags to camera gear. And I mean LV bags. So that won’t do.

Well, I do the same with Alex. When I first started shooting weddings, it was natural to ask him along. I felt a sense of security and bonding when we can do fun stuff together. Alright, I admit, not everyone’s idea of fun is standing on your feet for 10 hours, lugging heavy gear around, but thank God Alex does not complain.

The benefit of having yr spouse shooting with you is that you can share rooms when you’re outstation shooting a wedding. After a long day of shoot, you can come back and cuddle after a nice relaxing hot shower.

But what if one day, Alex decides not to shoot with me anymore? Gasp! What would I do? How would I feel?

musings-comm

I wonder sometimes if I can be a pretty selfish person. I like having him with me, doing fun stuff together (especially the things I consider fun). There are always 2 types of couples: One that does everything together and you think that they are joined at the hip. And the other that does NOTHING together other than meals or movies.

So what do I really expect from my spouse? What would my expectations be and would I be disappointed if his ideals change one day? What if Alex said one day, “I’d rather spend the entire day on Twitter and surfing the net than shooting with you”. Would I say, “It’s ok dear” but silently harbour a grudge because he PREFERS not to do the things I do?

Expectations can be an evil thing that rears its head every once in a while.

“But you’re the wife, I expected you to clean the house every week!”

“Why can’t you be a man and make decisions for once! I have to do everything!”

“I thought you’d stop playing computer games after we’re married and give me more attention for once. I keep seeing the back of your head everyday”

Yup, expectations can be the cause of many arguments especially if it is not communicated properly from the start.

Speaking of which, now that Alex is sick today, I better be the dutiful wife and nurse him back to health.