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musing

Everyday photos that you need to take

As a photographer, I have this innate desire and need to document my life. There are some important people, places or events that encompasses an essential part of who I am and the life I live. I believe that this process of documenting life is really important and I encourage you to think about your own life and how you can capture these moments because they become little windows into a memory that you once held dear.

1. Your house

It may seem trivial to take a photo of your house from the outside. But when you move and settle into a new home, you might find it hard to remember if there was a rose bush by the old gate or if your door was wooden or glass because those memories will fade. Just by looking at a picture of your old house on the outside can actually bring a flood of memories to mind of the times you spent pruning that rose bush and the barbeques you had on the porch.


My family home in Malacca where I spent my growing up years. This was the final goodbye as we packed the house to sell it in 2011.

2. The inside of your home

Just like the outside, you’ll want to remember the interior of the place you called home. Maybe one day your kids will want to see their old room, or the doorframe where you had their height measured every six months; and maybe even have a laugh at the type of furniture you had. They might even remember the time they spilled juice all over that carpet! They will be images that have far more sentimental value than you’d expect. This is one of the reasons I love photographing families in their own home, mess and all.


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Life, Love and Death

Video from KarmaTube

My sister shared this video with me recently. It was really sad and yet heart-warming to listen to this true story about a couple’s love for each other. If you’re super Malaysian like me, it’s pretty hard to understand the thick accent, so you need to listen really carefully to catch what they are saying. I don’t think it was just my pregnancy hormones, but I cried when I watched this video.

Everyone wants to be loved.

Everyone wants to feel a love so deep, so true, so faithful and so everlasting in life.

In some ways, I feel blessed. I have this amazing relationship with Alex and I can truly say that I love this man so much, much more today than the day I  married him 6 years ago. He’s traveling a lot this month, leaving me alone for days at a time. Even before he leaves, I start missing him already… sometimes I think I might have attachment issues. But this time alone makes me think about life…and also death.

I pray that God will allow us to grow old together, experience many wonders together, build a beautiful family and go on many adventures together. I think about all those newspaper articles where I read of people going through accidents and losing a loved one before their time is up, or people suffering from terminal illnesses. It really saddens me.

Alex is always very candid about this issue – if God takes him back early, it’s always because He allows it for a reason. And he always jokes… “I’ll allow you to marry again!”

Our conversations always end up the same… I argue with him that it’s better if God allowed me to go first, then I don’t have to suffer the agony of being here on earth without him.

Sigh. Who can predict the future? How will I know how much time I have with my loved ones? All that matters is today.

Show them love. Unabashed, not holding back, wholehearted.

Waiting to say “I Do!”

A few weeks ago, I heard this question posed over the radio… “Is it ok to marry someone who loves you less than you do?” Reminds me of some stories I heard through friends, of couples who have been together for years, the sparks are almost gone, but one party feels obligated to get married because of the years of relationship. Or one person who threatens to commit suicide if the other party doesn’t commit to a lifetime together.

Not everyone’s relationship is as dramatic as that, but that question got me thinking… how do you define the quantity of love? It seems like a slightly airy-fairy topic to me, because my partner may think that he loves me with all his heart, but I may not think his love is as intense as he describes it. It also depends on each person’s love language. If you have never heard of this concept before, do read the book or do this free quiz to find out what your love language is!

Looking back at my pre-married life of relationships with other guys, I do admit, there were times I was heartbroken when I sensed my love was a one way street… and then there were other times that I broke the other person’s heart because I didn’t ‘love’ him enough, even after years of being together.

Deep down, somehow, I just knew that I hadn’t found the right person.

One that I could truly say I loved with all my heart, and knew without a shadow of a doubt that he felt the same way towards me. (despite our differences in love languages!)

The issue of security remains something every woman struggles with. Breaking up with someone when you’re 23 or 32 makes a huge difference. So I can totally understand why some women opt to marry someone whom they know is 2nd best for them, just because they don’t want to be alone in life.

So, to wait, or not… ?

It’s a risk everyone takes, but personally, I think, if you’ve said the vows, commit to your decision, make it work, and don’t ever live in regret.