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Grace Tan
In Family + Children Portraits, Life, Musings, Parties & Events, Portraits, Relationships

Krysta’s 1st Birthday Party: Little Miss Theme

It’s been half a year since my beloved daughter Krysta turned one. It really just occurred to me how fast the year goes by (especially after they turn 1). When she was a baby, I would photograph her every month, just to see her physical changes. Maybe it was more apparent then… roll over, tummy time, crawling, walking… they were very real milestones. But after she turned 1… I don’t think I made such an effort to photograph her little moments or new milestones.

Now, with baby number 2 on the way, I have an even bigger challenge… to make sure I document his life with equal passion as I did Krysta’s. Even with the pregnancy, I am really not that ‘aware’ of the progress… when people ask me how far along I am… I have to think twice before replying. And that too, is with some hesitance.

I recently wrote a blog post about my intention to make time for family despite work commitments. I really do count it a blessing when I can spend half a day here or there midweek with my daughter, just doing simple things like reading a book together or playing chase in the living room.

Anyway, here’s some really belated photos of Krysta’s first birthday with a Lil’ Miss Theme. We chose the character Little Miss Chatterbox for her. Love the detail on the cake. I designed the logo and it was beautifully translated onto the cupcakes. We made little stickers with the logo too and placed it on cups and goodie bags. About 2 weeks before the party, I managed to find the Mr Men and Little Miss themed books from the Big Bad Wolf sale at a huge discount! So that made really nice gifts for the kids who came.

The food was a selection of my favourite hawker stall foods… everything from a lok-lok van to Village Park nasi lemak, to rojak from Bayu Timor… everyone loved it.

Photos were taken by Diane, and a few by Weiming.

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Grace Tan
In Family + Children Portraits, Life, Musings, Portraits, Relationships

Time and The Notion of Success

Recently, a series of events has caused me to think about life, our notion of success and what we do with our time. I came across this post by one of my favourite photographers Jasmine Star, where she talked about the notion of busyness, and how oftentimes, we equate it with success.

“Oh, you’re busy? Your business must be very successful then!”

But she pointed out in her post that rest and relaxation are equal indicators of success… that it is important to have a work-life balance and have time for friends and family members.

A week ago, Alex and I started the first of a series of parenting classes conducted by our church. In this course, we watched a DVD with real, parenting issues as brought up by Nicky and Sila, the trainers. Then we discussed these issues between us and also in a small group setting. Through this course, we were reminded that children really need to feel loved and that one of the ways of filling their emotional tank is to spend intentional time with them.

One of the pitfalls of running your own business is the need to ‘constantly’ work 24-7. There were days when Alex and I would be sitting in bed, but both still replying emails or doing some form of work. It came to a point that I thought it was really unhealthy and we needed to set aside boundaries for ourselves. How easy it is to let time slide by, just doing things that consume us at that point in time, but not really things that are truly important!

In the video for the 1st week, a dad related the story of how he used to tell bedtime stories to his daughter, but every so often, his phone would ring, and she would plead with him to just ignore it and finish the story. He would say, “This is important…” and then one phone call led to another and another, and then half an hour later, he would come back to her room with her fast asleep with the light still on and the book next to her head. But now, if you ask him, he can’t remember a single one of those calls that were ‘truly’ important, or what the content of them were.

It is really my heart’s desire to set aside time for the things that matter in life. The thing is that busyness will always be there. It will always consume us and before we know it, a day has gone by, and then a week, and then a month, or a year. If I don’t make intentional time for my family, or for friends, I’ll soon discover that all I ever did was being ‘busy’ with daily life and tasks.

To end this post, I’d just like to share a little video that Alex and I made. The journey of being a parent has been really amazing and one that we wouldn’t trade for the world. I used to think that being pregnant was a bit of a nuisance and a necessary ‘evil’, especially as a photographer. But after going through it with my first child, I realized there is no real convenient time to be pregnant. It shouldn’t be thought of as a burden, but as a gift. A beautiful gift from God.

Trailer: Krysta+Kyle from Stories on Vimeo.

Grace Tan
In Casual Portraits, Family + Children Portraits, Life, Musings, News, Relationships, Studio

Mom Is Beautiful

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As a 1.5 year old mom, I now fully appreciate what my parents used to do for me – the endless hours of sacrifice making sure that I grew up to be a responsible, mature adult. Memories of my mom include her waking up in the wee hours of the morning to prepare breakfast for me every day before I go to school. I did get sick of the milo, bread and half-boiled eggs after a while, but it was all done with love. My mom did not go to university, but she worked hard. After she was retrenched from her job in the fisheries department, she started her own business out of necessity.

She sold Pyrex, Arcopal (for those who don’t know what they are… they are heavy sets of dining plates, bowls, pots etc!) to anyone who was interested. She would travel mostly to the kampung in Malacca to sell to her majority Malay clientele. Even if the set was worth RM300, she would offer them an instalment plan, and diligently come back month after month to collect a mere RM10. The plates were definitely heavy, and I recall her having to lug it on her own to some of her client’s homes. As a child, I sometimes followed her on these trips (grudgingly). It was tough work, but she never complained (at least not to me!) and succeeded in her business.

When the Chinese New Year season came around, she would wake up at 5am to make cookies to sell them. Thousands and thousands of them. I was a very naughty daughter. I hated having to help in the kitchen, and tried to escape whenever I could, much to her despair. She would labour in the kitchen till midnight, and had to endure lots of nagging from my dad who didn’t like seeing her work so hard.

Well it did take a toll on her, and she fell sick when I was 13. My mom had a stroke which left her half paralyzed. She couldn’t do anything and had to learn to hold a fork and spoon again, learn to walk etc. It was really frustrating for her and my dad but she pulled through. She learnt how to drive again after much perseverance. I learnt that from her. To never give up despite life’s circumstances.

Now, my mom is 77, and she is not all she used to be. Her heart problems and other health issues has made her retreat into a shell. I feel a little sad about it all but I am glad that when she sees my daughter Krysta, her face lights up, if only for a few minutes.

Mummy, I love you. I don’t think I say it often enough.

xoxo,
Grace

Contest Details and T&C:

1. Find a photo with you and your mom (it could include other family members).
2. Write a story about why she is beautiful to you (any length!)
3. Share it with us by posting it on our Facebook wall (www.facebook.com/stories.my) before midnight Malaysian time on 16th May 2014.
4. Our judges will decide on the best (or most touching) story and decide on one winner.
5. The winner will receive a 1 hour family portrait shoot from Stories. The shoot must be done on a weekday before 31 August 2014. You can choose to do the shoot in our studio or outdoors within the Klang Valley. A Stories photographer will be assigned for the shoot. The winner will receive 20 soft copy images (printable up to 8R size) and one 12″ x 8″ matte print.
6. A limitation of up to 8 people is allowed for the shoot.
7. A surcharge of RM100 is chargeable for weekend dates. Outstation surcharge of RM800 applies for shoots done outside of Klang Valley. Costs of flights / transportation & accommodation is not included.
8. To purchase the entire set of high resolution images, a fee of RM500 is chargeable.
9. Up to 2 postponement of dates is allowed, however, if a 3rd postponement is required, the prize is considered forfeited.

Grace Tan
In International, Life, Musings, Relationships, Tips + Ideas

Reconnecting: New Zealand and Australia

I recently took 2 weeks off and headed south to the beautiful land where orcs, hobbits and dragons reside (if only in movies). It was a good time spent with my husband Alex, daughter Krysta and my 2 elderly aunts, Yan (from Melbourne) and Choo (from Malacca). Our main purpose in traveling to Australia was my aunt Yan’s 70th birthday celebration in Melbourne. But before that, we had a little road trip of our own.

I had a marvellous time driving past scenic mountains, quaint villages and lots and lots of sheep. It was a good time reconnecting with family members and just making time for each other. I spent hours playing with Krysta, moving stickers from the sheet to the floor, to my face… lots of time walking and having long conversations about life and family, jumping on the trampoline with a friend’s 6 year old in Auckland, and playing charades in a picnic with all my relatives in Melbourne (age group ranging from 16 months to 70+). What a blast!

It reminded me that we need to take time off to smell the roses and connect with people around us in the midst of our busy schedules. I read this article recently about 50 reasons why you may be unhappy in life, and one of the many listed were neglecting personal relationships. I believe that with all my heart. There’s this desire in every one of us to connect on a deeper level with other people around us, and if that connection is broken, our lives feel a little empty. Perhaps it is from a hurt or unforgiveness from the past. Maybe it is time to let go, and find out way back again, and reconnect.

OnthewaytoMilford

On another note, I often get comments on how easy Krysta is as a little traveler. Here are some of my thoughts on how to make life easier while traveling with a baby.

1. Pack light, wash clothes and only bring what is absolutely necessary! (Leave that flask behind… including all sorts of ‘nice to haves’ at home. You can probably make do without some of your usual comforts. We only packed these items for Krysta – some clothes, 2 milk bottles, milk powder, diapers, pacifiers, 2 pairs of shoes, a pack of stickers, a small amount of dishwashing liquid to clean the bottles, stroller, Baby Bjorn, no toys)

2. Find creative ways to keep the child entertained – This includes letting her play with everyday items like clothes pegs found at the apartment where we stayed at.

3. Train the child to sleep anywhere – Ok I guess not every family is like ours, but Krysta has been traveling since she was 2 months old, so she is used to sleeping anywhere and everywhere, including on top of a table at a street hawker stall in Bangkok while she was 2 months old! (I might get some bad rep here for doing things like these by other parents!)

4. Be flexible – Well, don’t be too stressed about planning every little detail for your trip. If it doesn’t work out, or baby is cranky, just take it in stride and be flexible enough to change plans at the last minute.

Hope that helps! Here’s a little smattering of photos from my trip.

The beautiful and most photographed church in Lake Tekapo – The Church of the Good Shepherd.

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Grace Tan
In Life, Musings, Relationships

Chinese New Year Memories

As I was growing up, every Chinese New Year would be a season of laughter, good food and memories. Strangely, in my Peranakan family, ketupat and rendang was one of our staple Chinese New Year cuisine, together with tosai and idly. I never really thought too much of it growing up (till I went to KL and found out that normal Chinese families don’t do things like these!). But the months leading up to Chinese New Year was also a season of stress because my mom would be up for many hours from 4am till midnight baking cookies in her little oven pictured below.

oven

It was her passion and also her business. She would bake hundreds upon hundreds of butter cookies, prune cookies, pineapple tarts, love letters and lots of other types of cookies to sell. Amazingly, she did most of it single handedly. Unfortunately, I was the little grumpy kitchen helper who hated to meticulously place lines across pineapple tarts for hours on end.

And my dad… well, he needless to say, he gave my mom added stress because he wasn’t really supportive of her long hours, especially after she fell ill with heart problems. He wanted her to rest and give up this business but my mom really loved doing this. On hindsight, I wished I helped her more in the kitchen those days instead of just running away the moment I had the chance.

Now that I’ve moved to KL and left Malacca, I kind of miss the days when I had lots of cookies to eat. My mom no longer bakes and my dad is in his advanced stage of Alzheimer’s. Do cherish the little moments in life, especially with your family members this festive season. Have a good celebration with your family and friends, and remember to take lots of photos.

Love,
Grace

tarts

 

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